How to Find Your Life's Purpose
You're Always Good Enough
"I'm not good at anything" is a false belief.
If you say that about yourself you're wrong, and I'll tell you why.
Your outer life is a representation of your inner life.
Like a mirror, what you project out into the world will be reflected back to you.
Despite the challenges we all face, the only limit to your greatness is yourself.
All of us have felt at some point in time that we're not good enough. If you feel that way now, you’re not alone.
So what would make a person feel like they're not good enough?
Why Are People Not Good Enough?
1. Low Self-Esteem
Our past experiences, especially when we were children, affect our self-identity and who we become.
You can think back now, as an adult, to an experience when you were young.
That event shaped how you see yourself and the world around you, even to this day.
If growing up you were belittled you for what you did wrong and ignored what you did right, your self-esteem suffers.
Regardless if it's true or not, when your mind is continually reinforced with the same message it accepts it to be true.
3. How You Were Raised
Self-esteem and confidence come from overcoming challenges and adversity.
When children are overprotected and shielded from the harsh realities of life, as adults they have difficulty dealing with struggle and discomfort.
To become a high functioning, capable adult you have to to forge your character in the fire of adversity.
Being weak and overly sensitive leads to low self-esteem and feeling not good enough.
Next time you say "I'm not good at anything" think about where that belief came from.
How to Improve Your Self Image
1. Check Your Self-Talk
Self-talk is how you speak to yourself consistently.
“I can’t do that”, “What if I fail?”, “they might reject me if I ask them out” are a few examples of negative self-talk.
To change your thoughts you need to change how you speak to yourself and the images you create in your mind.
Every self-thought you have reinforces the previous one.
Make positive self-talk a habit and you’ll have an arsenal of powerful beliefs about yourself.
2. Use Visualisation
How you see yourself is how you'll feel about yourself.
Improving yourself comes down to improving your self-image.
Develop a vision of the ideal you.
What do you look like, what’s your posture, how do you walk and talk?
Make that vision bright and vivid and keep it in the forefront of your mind.
3. Do Self-Analysis
Self-analysis is taking inventory of your character.
You identify which parts of you empower you, and which ones weaken you.
Discard what you no longer need and cut anything out of your life that doesn’t correspond with who you want to be and how you want to live.
Your thoughts change from "I'm not good at anything" to "I can be great at anything I apply set my mind to".
4. Set Goals and Take Action
Confidence and self-esteem, and becoming good at things, start with having a purpose.
Your positive self-image starts to transform when you have clearly defined goals and objectives, and you’re taking action.
What is Your Life's Purpose?
1. What it Means to Have a Life Purpose
Your life purpose is the primary motivating aim that you invest your time, effort, and resources into developing and achieving.
Having a purpose defines who you become and the trajectory your life will take.
Your purpose is unique to you.
It determines the decisions you make and the actions you take.
No one can choose your purpose for you. Only you can do that.
2. Why Having a Life Purpose Matters
Life purpose gives meaning and structure to your life.
Without one you drift with an emptiness in your soul, never getting to meet your true and authentic self.
When you're missing a purpose to your life you start thinking you're not good at anything.
Living in alignment with your purpose has positive ramifications to the people around you.
How? Because you don’t live in a siloed society.
What you do affects everyone else.
Your choice to follow your purpose wholeheartedly inspires others to do the same, and wake's them up to their own potential.
By elevating yourself you lift the elevate the people around you.
3. How to Find Your Life Purpose
Some people realize their purpose when they're young.
For others, it takes longer to find.
You don’t so much find your purpose as your purpose finds you.
When you least expect it your purpose, or an embryo of your true purpose, will reveal itself to you.
Think about what your true calling might be.
Is it right in front of your face but you haven’t seen it?
What would it be if you were completely unrestricted and unlimited in your ability? Think global, start local.
If your purpose is to build a billion-dollar company, start something small and aim for $10,000 in revenue.
If your purpose is to feed a billion people, start by feeding 10.
As you reach each progressive benchmark scale your efforts to the next.
4. There's Only One Way to Find Out
The only way to know your true purpose is to take action and try.
If you're still as passionate 6 months in you might have something.
If your interest wanes and the initiative doesn’t light you up anymore it wasn’t your purpose.
That’s ok, it was a needed step towards finding your truth. Don’t regret anything.
Keep moving forward towards your purpose.
How to Get Good at Anything
1. Ferocious Curiosity
Interest is the first step to getting good at anything.
If you’re not interested you won’t be prepared to take action.
To get good at anything, meaning above average, requires fierce and ferocious curiosity and enthusiasm.
When your interest becomes your obsession you’ll start seeing results.
2. A Winning Attitude
The attitude which you approach any task decides your outcome.
When you’re interested in something and you want to get good at it, start with the right attitude.
- Curious and eager to learn
- Willing to work
- Commitment to mastery
- Refusal to quit when it gets hard or the novelty wears off
- Long term mindset
- Realistic expectations of short term results (you might fail at first)
- Not overly serious, you’re supposed to enjoy it
3. A Bias Towards Action
Dreaming and procrastination is for losers with an unrealistic idea about success.
Getting good and gaining mastery in any area is achieved by doing.
There is no substitute for action.
Of course, you need to take intelligent, not careless action.
So to that point, you do need to think.
But overanalysis kills any hope you have of ever getting good at anything.
Set a plan and take action. You can make any changes you need along the way.
4. Be Consistent
Ever dabbled in something without committing wholeheartedly to it?
Of course, you have. We all have.
How were your results? Probably not so good.
Consider two people starting Karate, both as white belts.
The first is interested, but not committed.
He shows up irregularly, doesn’t show up for a few weeks and when he does, trains minimal times per week.
The second shows up consistently.
He isn’t overly obsessed, he just keeps showing up consistently a few times per week.
After 12 months the difference in skill level between the two will be immeasurable.
Next time you think you're not good at anything, remember
consistent practice and participation is the key to developing any skill set.
5. Find Pleasure in What You Do
If you don’t enjoy it, don’t do it.
Life’s too short and there are too many other things you can be doing.
Finding enjoyment in a task produces a level of skill and ability you don’t have when you’re bored or disinterested.
6. Make Success a Habit
Habits are formed by repeating the same action over and over until you no longer have to consciously think about it.
Skill and mastery are obtained when the task is performed by the unconscious mind as an automatic action and response.
When you consciously try to do something you’re too prone to overthinking and distraction.
When you’ve habituated your desired behaviours your conscious mind takes a backseat and you just “flow”.
7. Never Quit
One reason you might feel you’re not good at anything is that you give up too soon.
The notion you’ll be a superstar overnight is delusional. Skill takes time. Your mind and body need to adapt and internalise new behaviours.
No matter the activity, there’s always an awkward period in the beginning.
You have to expect that and be willing to work through it. Anything worth doing well is worth doing not well at the start.
Bottom line: Decide and commit. Stay consistent. Don’t be weak and quit just because you’re not seeing results.
It might take longer than you originally thought. Stay with it.
Keep taking action and above all else, enjoy the process.
Quotes About Not Being Good at Anything
""And above all things, never think that you're not good enough yourself. A man should never think that. My belief is that in life people will take you at your own reckoning" - Isaac Asimov
"We're all different, so even though someone is getting a skill before you, it doesn't mean that you're not good enough; it just means you have to wait a little bit, and the skill will come when it comes" - Laurie Hernandez
"I put a lot of pressure on myself. I think something's not good enough, and I won't stop until I feel like I've made it. I'm never satisfied" - J. Cole
"I feel a kinship with anyone who feels that their road, their life or who they really are is not good enough. I really relate to that" - Baz Luhrmann