How to Fail and Keep Winning
Do You Feel Like a Failure?
How do you pick yourself up when you feel like a failure?
Failure doesn't feel good but it's an essential part of your personal growth.
If you don't learn how to deal with it you won't be able to handle success when it comes.
The truth is that everyone fails.
But how you perceive and respond to the failure is what determines your overall success.
Can Failure Be Positive?
Is it possible to see failure as a sign of progress.
Sounds weird right?
If you fail it means you're trying. Your life has motion.
If you never fail you're playing too safe.
Your goals aren't big enough. Your work rate isn't high enough.
You're not putting yourself outside of your comfort zone.
Think about the start up world and the entrepreneurial mindset.
They seek out failure and see it as a sign of progress.
Fast failure means they save valuable time and resources.
They gain insights into what worked and what didn't.
Then they use that knowledge to improve their product or service.
How would life be if you adopted that mindset.
Success isn't about not failing.
Success comes from failing and getting yourself back up.
5 Ways to Start Winning
1. Accept Full Responsibility
Sometimes you have to accept that you screwed up.
It's normal to feel regret and shame when you fail, particularly if you have high personal standards.
But now it's time to make things right.
The more time you spend blaming yourself or other people the worse things become.
Take responsibility of your life.
What decisions or actions put you here?
What would you do differently next time to create a better result?
Until you take responsibility for where you are you can’t make things better.
No one is coming to save you. It's on you to turn things around.
What's the first small step you can take to start improving your situation?
2. Identify Where You Went Wrong
Self-assessment is critical when you feel like a failure.
You create your outcomes by your habitual thoughts and actions.
If you can identify where you went wrong you'll be able to avoid it in the future.
You might have character traits that are the source of your failure.
What parts of your personality would you discard if you could?
You might need to raise your personal standards and start demanding more from yourself.
Until you self assess yourself you wont know where the problem is.
That's why you need to identify where you went wrong and what caused the problem to begin with.
Identify your weak points and decide to fix them.
3. Find Gold in the Mud
When failure hits it can feel like the end of the world.
You can slip into devastation and hopelessness quite easily.
But as time passes your perspective starts to change.
The experience taught you something valuable and changed who you are as a person.
You look back at the event and you're almost glad it happened.
You're in a much better place now but it couldn't have happened without that initial 'failure'.
Extracting gold from failure means finding value from the experience then using that value to make your life better.
When you start looking for gold you'll eventually find it.
You'll start seeing things about yourself you never noticed before.
These hidden gems of insight and wisdom are priceless.
When you can extract gold from your problems and failures your probability of success increases exponentially.
Your past failures were necessary for you to find the success you were looking for in the first place.
When you feel like a failure, look a little deeper.
Is this really a problem? Or is it a gift in disguise?
It's a matter of perspective, and you get to choose.
4. Put Your Focus on the Solution
When things go wrong it's easy to let the problem consume you.
Sure you need to acknowledge the problem. But don't dwell on it.
You can't go back and change the past, but you can influence the present and the future.
Focus on that. Put your energy into the solution.
The longer you stay in overwhelm and defeat the harder it is to get yourself out.
Ask yourself “how can I turn this around?"
"What can I learn from this that I'll never do again?".
Bend your failures to your advantage.
Decide that despite the discomfort and pain you will come out on top.
The most successful people on the planet are the ones who solve the biggest problems.
See things for what they are.
Don't be naively optimistic or overly pessimistic.
When you're feeling like a failure, pause for a moment.
Change your focus from the helplessness of the problem to the empowerment of the solution.
See your outcome as you want it to be.
Your energy flows where your focus goes. So point your focus in the right direction.
Invest your energy on the solution and remember that action is always the answer.
5. Show Gratitude
No matter how dark things get there's always someone a lot worse off.
Jordan Peterson says it best; "It might be a tragedy but at least it's not hell".
The pain of failure corresponds to your perception of it.
Taking your attention away from what’s wrong and put it towards what's going well.
Start with simple things.
Once you're in gratitude your mind becomes more receptive to solutions.
When you feel like a failure, pause for a moment.
Think about what you're grateful for.
Failure can either destroy you or make you a better version of yourself.
The choice is yours.
Best Quotes About Failure
"Sometimes by losing a battle you find a new way to win the war" - Donald Trump
"Far better is it to dare mighty things, to win glorious triumphs, even though checkered by failure... than to rank with those poor spirits who neither enjoy nor suffer much, because they live in a grey twilight that knows not victory nor defeat" - Theodore Roosevelt
"The greatest glory in living lies not in never falling, but in rising every time we fall" - Ralph Waldo Emerson
"I can accept failure, everyone fails at something. But I can't accept not trying" -Michael Jordan