7 Effective Ways to Fall in Love With Yourself
BY CHRIS SAVAGE
What Does It Mean to Love Yourself?
Falling in love with yourself can mean many things.
Accepting and knowing yourself, and living a productive and rewarding life.
Having self-respect and clear boundaries for what you’ll accept and what you won't.
Add to that a healthy self-image that isn’t dependent upon anyone but yourself.
Let’s add one more definition to loving yourself;
A commitment to never-ending improvement.
When you’re a better version of yourself you make the world around you better as well.
Why Do People Not Love Themselves?
The sad truth is that most people don’t love themselves.
There's been times in my life where I didn’t like or love myself.
If that’s where you are right now, you're not alone.
When you think of your past what comes to mind? Your successes or your failures?
I’d made every mistake and failed at almost everything before I finally found success.
The only way I could move beyond my failures and keep pushing on was to reprogram my mind.
I upgraded my mental software to think and act like a winner instead of always thinking of my past failures.
How did I do that?
By applying the strategies you are about to learn in this post!
7 Effective Ways to Fall in Love With Yourself
1. Acknowledge Your Wins (Make a List)
People are great at reliving their failures in great detail while forgetting their past success.
Stop and think about it for a moment.
What have you accomplished throughout your life that you could be proud of?
What about yourself could you love if you wanted to?
Try this: keep a log of all your wins in a spreadsheet or a journal.
They don't have to be giant accomplishments.
They can be small daily wins when little things go your way.
The key to being successful in anything is to feel good about yourself while you’re doing it.
You’ll always get a better result when you feel good about yourself.
That’s why it’s so important to remember your wins.
It puts your current position into perspective and helps you to love yourself more.
2. Improve the Way You Communicate With Yourself
Think about how you communicate with yourself.
What does the voice in your head sound like?
When you do something wrong do you berate yourself in a gremlin-like voice?
Or do you speak to yourself like you would someone special?
Or do you speak to yourself in a soothing tone, confident that this setback is only temporary?
Do you make mental pictures of yourself looking bad or foolish as things don’t work out and you fail again?
Or do you see a large, bright image of yourself standing on a winners' podium with a big smile on your face?
Failure isn't as catastrophic as you might think.
Choose to see it as a mere blip in the long term, bigger picture of your life.
When you know how you communicate to yourself you can start doing it better.
Your self-talk is going on all day every day.
So make it less judgemental, and more encouraging.
3. View Yourself From a Different Perspective
It’s tempting to believe that how we see ourselves is how everyone else sees us.
But the truth is that they don’t know you’re you.
All they know is the person you want to show them.
That doesn’t mean being fake or disingenuous.
It means that who you are is subjective depending on who you ask.
Imagine someone who adores you. How do you think they see you?
What qualities do you think they see when they look at you?
Try to step out of yourself for a moment and view yourself from a new perspective.
You’ve had times where you felt amazing, on top of the world.
You’ve probably also had moments where you felt like a piece of turd.
You felt that way because of what you were choosing to focus on at the moment you were thinking about it.
4. Change What You Don’t Like About Yourself
Who you are isn’t set in stone.
Think of your life as a clay sculpture on a spiral spinner.
You’re the artist moulding the shape, texture, and features of your masterpiece.
If there’s something you don’t like about yourself, change it. Redesign it.
Who says you can't?
There’s always an alternative.
If you don’t like something you can choose something different.
Discard the parts of yourself you don't like and replace them with something better.
5. Treat Yourself Like You Would Someone Special
Would you berate an innocent child for making a few mistakes?
Of course, you wouldn’t.
So why would you do it to yourself?
How often are we kinder to our neighbours than we are to ourselves?
Think of how you would treat someone special. You would be kind for starters.
You’d speak to them nicely, give compliments where due, and keep your word when you make a commitment.
How about treating yourself like that?
Don’t treat yourself well only when things are going right.
You’re special 24 hours a day, 365 days a year regardless of whatever else is going on. No exceptions.
6. Improve Your Physical Body
Your mind and body are part of the same system.
When one is thriving the other does too, and vice versa.
I've been unhealthy and sick to a life-threatening degree.
I’ve also been in outstanding physical and mental shape, and remain so today.
When your body is in good condition your mind works infinitely better than when you're sick and unhealthy.
When you're healthy you like yourself more.
You communicate better, and you have more drive to achieve your goals and objectives.
How could you not fall in love with yourself?
Improving your physical body is a result of your daily habits.
You don’t have to train like David Goggins, though it wouldn't hurt to have his mentality and work ethic.
People who take care of themselves radiate different energy than those who don’t.
That energy reverberates to all areas of your life, attracting what you want and repelling what you don't.
When our standards fall and we live below our potential we fall out of love with ourselves.
The desire to progress and grow is part of our DNA.
The best solutions to our problems are usually the most simple ones.
Maybe the reason you don’t love yourself is that you’re not being all you could be.
An elite athlete was once asked how he was able to become so much better than any of his competitors.
His answer changed my life.
“I reached that level by demanding more from myself than anyone else could ever expect,” he said.
Try adopting that mindset and see where it takes you.
The world is yours if you want it to be.
You just have to be willing to go get it.
Stay focused and keep winning!
Quotes About Falling in Love With Yourself
“The moment you know yourself you have known the most precious thing in existence” - Osho
“You start to live the moment you stop competing with others” - Maxime Lagacé
“You can’t really love someone else unless you really love yourself first” - Fred Rogers
“Do your thing and don’t care if they like it” - Tina Fey
“Because one believes in oneself, one doesn’t try to convince others. When one is content with oneself, one doesn’t need others’ approval. Because one accepts oneself, the whole world accepts him or her” - Lao Tzu
“Until you value yourself, you won’t value your time. Until you value your time, you won’t do anything with it” - M. Scott Peck